Ficlet: Torchwood.
Nov. 20th, 2006 04:56 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
fangrrl_squeesSo, er... Jack and Ianto just had a shouting match in my head. And they didn't even end up making out at the end of it, damn them.
It's a bit rough, as it's another bashed out at work bit, but whatever, it helped killed the end-of-the-day doldrums.
***
The fight had been brewing for weeks, but that didn’t make it any easier when the words were finally said – shouted, in fact – across the boardroom’s table.
“Why couldn’t you help her? Save her the way you did me?”
Shit. He remembered. Jack counted the human mind’s ability to blank out what it didn’t understand in the midst of trauma. Of all the times for that to fail…
“It doesn’t work like that.” The words tasted unpleasant, as white lies often did.
“Are you sure?”
Jack didn’t like the look Ianto was giving him, but he knew he could brazen it out. But why should I? Doesn’t he at least deserve the truth – even if he wouldn’t do the same for us?
“I don’t know,” he admitted. “I didn’t think to try.”
Ianto didn’t buy it, “Why not?”
In for a penny, in for a pound. “You kill monsters. You didn’t try to save them. There’s nothing to save. There certainly wasn’t of Lisa.”
Ianto head sank into his hands, trying to hide. Anger he could share, could take out on someone, but not this. “Go away,” he muttered, blinking fiercely. “Go away and leave me alone like you always do.”
Jack almost did as Ianto asked, but thought better of it. “No.”
“What?” Surprise jarred him out of his misery.
“I said no. I’m not going to let you blame me for what happened, for not ‘saving’ Lisa, when you could have done it yourself.”
Ianto stared at Jack, words not quite coming as they should.
“All you had to do was tell us about her. You bitch at me for not knowing a damn thing about you or anyone else on the team, but you never bothered to do anything about that, yourself. But if you could have just told us. Told me…” It hurt Jack more than he could say that Ianto didn’t or couldn’t confide in him.
Ianto looked disgusted. “Why? So you could kill the monster that much sooner?”
Jack shook his head, regretting his earlier choice of words. “She only went over the edge when you… released her.” Jack insisted. “You admitted that much yourself - that she changed at the end. Freedom for her in that state was too much.” At least, that’s my theory. “But before then. God only knows what we could have done. You’ve got two brilliant physicians out there,” Jack waved a hand in the general direction of the Hub’s central workspace, “and I’m a pretty good engineer. Clearly you’ve got some talent in that area, too, or else you wouldn’t have been able to keep her alive as long as you did. But for whatever reason, you decided to keep her a secret and now she’s dead. Your choice. Your consequences.”
“That’s not-”
“Not true? Bullshit. You kept your girlfriend locked up like Sleeping Beauty and why?” Ianto looked dejected and said nothing. “That wasn’t a goddamn rhetorical question!” Now it was Jack’s turn to shout. “After all the shit we’ve been through, after all the times we’ve had to save each other’s asses, you still decided to keep something that big, that important to yourself, and I want to know why, damn it! Did you really think we’d try to kill her on sight? Or did you just like having your girl in a bell jar, safe and sound from all other men? Nice relationship you musta had.”
That did it. Ianto jumped to his feet. “Like you know sod all about happy relationships.” he snapped. “Living in a fucking hole in the ground and shagging your way through every bar in Cardiff.”
Jack winced. Perhaps making it personal wasn’t such a good idea. He’d forgotten that Ianto was the most observant member of the team, given the chance. He sagged back in his chair and looked into a cup of coffee, long since cold. “Point.” He conceded, the irritation seeping away like rain on dry ground. “But that doesn’t answer the question.”
Ianto glared, bristling at Jack’s insistence. “I didn’t trust you, alright? Happy?” Anything but, Jack thought. “I didn’t trust you, Owen, Tosh or even Suzie. I couldn’t trust you not to see Lisa and immediately think of her as a thing.” Ianto shuddered at the memory of the Japanese expert who hadn’t done much better. “Based on what you’ve done in the past, are you really surprised? You’d want to study her,” derision dripped from the word. “Probably dissect her. Or keep her locked up and miserable forever.”
Jack thought about this, eyes still on the cup of coffee. “You’re right.” He sighed. “We would have, and it would have been the wrong thing to do – to you and Lisa.” Jack shoved the cup away and forced himself to look at Ianto, who was doing his best to stay on his feet and furious – but the façade was cracking. “But you should have asked us for help. Given us a chance to try what you wanted.” Even if it killed her, which it almost certainly would have. Jack ignored the little voice that reminded him how many people he’d saved from the brink of death.
“So it’s all my fault, is it?” Ianto asked, bitterly.
Jack nodded and sighed as Ianto stalked out of the boardroom, radiating fury and resentment. That could have gone better, he thought with an inward sigh. I miss Suzie.
It's a bit rough, as it's another bashed out at work bit, but whatever, it helped killed the end-of-the-day doldrums.
***
The fight had been brewing for weeks, but that didn’t make it any easier when the words were finally said – shouted, in fact – across the boardroom’s table.
“Why couldn’t you help her? Save her the way you did me?”
Shit. He remembered. Jack counted the human mind’s ability to blank out what it didn’t understand in the midst of trauma. Of all the times for that to fail…
“It doesn’t work like that.” The words tasted unpleasant, as white lies often did.
“Are you sure?”
Jack didn’t like the look Ianto was giving him, but he knew he could brazen it out. But why should I? Doesn’t he at least deserve the truth – even if he wouldn’t do the same for us?
“I don’t know,” he admitted. “I didn’t think to try.”
Ianto didn’t buy it, “Why not?”
In for a penny, in for a pound. “You kill monsters. You didn’t try to save them. There’s nothing to save. There certainly wasn’t of Lisa.”
Ianto head sank into his hands, trying to hide. Anger he could share, could take out on someone, but not this. “Go away,” he muttered, blinking fiercely. “Go away and leave me alone like you always do.”
Jack almost did as Ianto asked, but thought better of it. “No.”
“What?” Surprise jarred him out of his misery.
“I said no. I’m not going to let you blame me for what happened, for not ‘saving’ Lisa, when you could have done it yourself.”
Ianto stared at Jack, words not quite coming as they should.
“All you had to do was tell us about her. You bitch at me for not knowing a damn thing about you or anyone else on the team, but you never bothered to do anything about that, yourself. But if you could have just told us. Told me…” It hurt Jack more than he could say that Ianto didn’t or couldn’t confide in him.
Ianto looked disgusted. “Why? So you could kill the monster that much sooner?”
Jack shook his head, regretting his earlier choice of words. “She only went over the edge when you… released her.” Jack insisted. “You admitted that much yourself - that she changed at the end. Freedom for her in that state was too much.” At least, that’s my theory. “But before then. God only knows what we could have done. You’ve got two brilliant physicians out there,” Jack waved a hand in the general direction of the Hub’s central workspace, “and I’m a pretty good engineer. Clearly you’ve got some talent in that area, too, or else you wouldn’t have been able to keep her alive as long as you did. But for whatever reason, you decided to keep her a secret and now she’s dead. Your choice. Your consequences.”
“That’s not-”
“Not true? Bullshit. You kept your girlfriend locked up like Sleeping Beauty and why?” Ianto looked dejected and said nothing. “That wasn’t a goddamn rhetorical question!” Now it was Jack’s turn to shout. “After all the shit we’ve been through, after all the times we’ve had to save each other’s asses, you still decided to keep something that big, that important to yourself, and I want to know why, damn it! Did you really think we’d try to kill her on sight? Or did you just like having your girl in a bell jar, safe and sound from all other men? Nice relationship you musta had.”
That did it. Ianto jumped to his feet. “Like you know sod all about happy relationships.” he snapped. “Living in a fucking hole in the ground and shagging your way through every bar in Cardiff.”
Jack winced. Perhaps making it personal wasn’t such a good idea. He’d forgotten that Ianto was the most observant member of the team, given the chance. He sagged back in his chair and looked into a cup of coffee, long since cold. “Point.” He conceded, the irritation seeping away like rain on dry ground. “But that doesn’t answer the question.”
Ianto glared, bristling at Jack’s insistence. “I didn’t trust you, alright? Happy?” Anything but, Jack thought. “I didn’t trust you, Owen, Tosh or even Suzie. I couldn’t trust you not to see Lisa and immediately think of her as a thing.” Ianto shuddered at the memory of the Japanese expert who hadn’t done much better. “Based on what you’ve done in the past, are you really surprised? You’d want to study her,” derision dripped from the word. “Probably dissect her. Or keep her locked up and miserable forever.”
Jack thought about this, eyes still on the cup of coffee. “You’re right.” He sighed. “We would have, and it would have been the wrong thing to do – to you and Lisa.” Jack shoved the cup away and forced himself to look at Ianto, who was doing his best to stay on his feet and furious – but the façade was cracking. “But you should have asked us for help. Given us a chance to try what you wanted.” Even if it killed her, which it almost certainly would have. Jack ignored the little voice that reminded him how many people he’d saved from the brink of death.
“So it’s all my fault, is it?” Ianto asked, bitterly.
Jack nodded and sighed as Ianto stalked out of the boardroom, radiating fury and resentment. That could have gone better, he thought with an inward sigh. I miss Suzie.
![[identity profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/openid.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2006-11-21 09:52 pm (UTC)Wait, what am I saying? That's complete BS. My characters give me as much grief as real people ever did.
*headdesk* We can't win!!
I'm toddling off to a two hour meeting now, so I s'pect I won't 'see' you 'til you're up again in the morning. ;)