(no subject)

[fangrrl_squees]

jack_harkness_ has definitely woken up from hibernation. Heh.

Now I just need some fabulously witty ideas for how he died with a javelin through him. If I rummage through my brain a little more...

PS. More filthy (metaphorically and literally) Harkness-in-chains pictures, plz. Because, really, my dirty mind hasn't wasted nearly enough time at work today...

Comments

[fangrrl-squees.livejournal.com]

Indeed!

But, as with most of my non-TW Jack posts, there's a certain pressure to make 'em as witty as humanly possible and, dammit, comedy is tough!

[ladykoori.livejournal.com]

uh.....he was hitting on some track runner and the javelin thrower had really bad aim????

I've got nothing. Its so tough being funny.

[baronlaw.livejournal.com]

Does it have to be a javelin, could it be a spear or maybe a harpoon?

[fangrrl-squees.livejournal.com]

Javelin was what was mentioned in the eps, so I feel kinda compelled to stick (ouch) with that.

But it could be a martial javelin, not a track-and-field type thing, certainly.

[baronlaw.livejournal.com]

Well I believe several cultures including the Greeks use a short war spear/javelin for the shock effect when first engaging in combat.

So I'm thinking a fight in a museum with an unexpectedly resourceful opponent or a bit of time travel by accident.

"Why didn't you mention the museum director was an ex-decathalete? I had him cornered in the Greek display when... Ka-chunk.. very embarrassing and he got away!"

Javelins and hygiene

[borderlad.livejournal.com]

He noted a bit of spinach between his teeth. The rest kind of writes itself, don't ya think?

Oh, okay...

Toothpicks being in short supply due to a fierce labor dispute between lumberjacks and timber company owners (and something about spotted owls needing a place to fornicate), he pulled his javelin out of his back pocket to take care of the problem. (Well, where do you keep *your* javelins?) For the sake of the fornicating owls, the javelin could/should be made of aluminum.

Sadly, as he'd also been keeping his spare ice cube back there, the javelin was a bit slippery. There was a tragic and wholely unforseeable accident.

All that remains for you to do is to decide whether he succeeded in dislodging the spinach before he died.

Told ya it writes itself...

Death by Vangelis

[borderlad.livejournal.com]

Some enthusiastic moron was fantasizing that he was the lead in "Chariots of Fire." Unfortunately, the genius was not only listening to his MP3 player containing nothing other than the theme from said movie, but also felt that to really get into the moment, he needed to be dressed up like a track star and carry a javelin as he ran.

His mother only ever told him not to run with scissors. She never said anything about running with a javelin and closing your eyes just as the music climaxes so as to better soak in the glory of the fantasy.

Whoopsie-daisy.

Post-partem sports depression

[borderlad.livejournal.com]

-Darryl Strawberry
-Jose Canseco
-Pete Rose

We've seen what happens when baseball players can't handle life.

But nobody's yet documented what happened to Bruce Jenner after the 1976 Olympics...

Because the others were too plausible

[borderlad.livejournal.com]

Jack could be helping an old lady across the street when the world's most confused terrorist blows up a sporting goods store. One of the bits of deadly flying debris is, of course, said javelin.
...The old lady is unscathed.

(Of course, with a sporting goods store, you have the option of making a lawn dart the lethal missile.)